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Christmas Wrapping

Read on, it’s long, but maybe my pain may give you a laugh. But before I start, it has nothing to do with religion, music, shopping or anything else.  It’s all about the presents, not giving nor receiving, it’s about wrapping.  The most painful thing int the world.  And here is why.  It starts off a month early when you have to pull down the box of paper and all the other Christmas stuff.  But finally, time to get to work.  You clear off a space on the floor, have all your stuff, paper, ribbon, tape, scissors, labels, and bows.  Then you realize, oh crap, I can’t reach the presents, so you try to lean over, but can’t make it, and the roll of paper is not long enough.  So get up, move the stuff closer, so now you don’t have enough room.  So you do some small stuff, after the first few, your legs have fallen to sleep.  So you pick up all your junk and move to a counter, but no TV, so no distractions, boring.  The first thing you pick up is some weird shaped package.  After fumbling around with it you get the right size you need and cut it.  you get the thing wrapped, but now cannot find the tape, which is hiding under the roll of paper, which it is now stuck to.  You get that fix, only to shuffle things around so that your present comes un-wrapped.  So you fix that, get it taped, begin to fold it, never mind the fact that there are no two same wrapped presents you have done.  As you fold, you cut the paper crooked so now some of the white backside of the paper is showing, but darn it, where are the scissors now, yup, under the present, only to realize that they have torn the paper.  start over.  Finally, all wrapped, get the ribbon, you need it because that is the only thing holding the paper together because you ran out of tape near the end.  Done, at last, one down, oh darn, a lot more to go.  no two presents wrapped the same, even ones the exact same size and with square corners.  Finally, down to the last one, the pile of presents on the floor look like an explosion of loose wrapping paper and ripped corners.  But yes, the last one, your last piece of paper…Yup, that is right, just 1/2″ short of being big enough.  So you say enough of it, reach for a bag to put it in, but not big enough.  So you cut the bag to fill in the 1/2″ gap.  who cares if they are not matching.  You are done.  Until your remember the other pile to be done.  true story, almost.

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